Just a regular day
by Imaginary-Paperdolls
Summary: I suggest watching Llamas with hats since this story is just the human version of Paul and Carl. Yaoi and light smut with dark humor only Llamas with Hats fans can understand. Also, Carl makes use of the baby hands.


I sighed heavily as whatever it was Carl was doing doing downstairs, kept me awake again. I had long since gave up on trying to ask him what he was doing. His answers always involved the skinning, dismembering, grinding up, or cooking of other people. The most horrifying thing he had ever done was when he thought it was my birthday and had blew up a city. Charred faces attached to balloons slowly rained down on us. He stood there with a childish grin on his face. I was more horrified than I had ever been. Deep down though... Like really really really deep, I was touched. He went and did something that wasn't selfish. He wanted to make me happy on my birthday even though it wasn't my birthday... Ugh, that doesn't make what he did right. Nothing he did was right. All I could really do was disapprove of every behavior (not like it worked to begin with). There's really no winning with him. I disapprove of his behavior, he tries to find worse things to do. I aprrove his behavior, he gives me this look that I don't even know what to call.

"Somebody help me!"

"Aaaahhhhh!"

I growl and cover my head with my pillow, trying to block out the screams. They even haunt me in my dreams. Why couldn't Carl just be a normal roommate with normal hobbies with normal ideas? Instead he's sadistic, evil, psycho, thoughtful, caring, looks good in a tight shirt- Ugh! What the hell am I thinking?! I'd move out but the last time I did, he nearly destroyed the whole world and went crazy. He was talking to a mask he made in my likeness with the skin and melded bones of orphans. Had I not come back and burned that thing, who knows what would've happened to him... Er, the world, I definitely meant to say the world.

"My leg!"

"Hahahahahahahahahahah!"

After an hour, everything went dead silent. I took advantage of the silence and quickly went to sleep, dreaming that Carl and I were Llamas with hats for some odd reason. As I slept, I felt gentle hands slowly lift my shirt above my chest. Ghostly fingertips lightly pinched and played with my nipples. What kind of dream is this? Why does it feel so good? I moan softly and keep myself from waking up so as to not lose this feeling. A hand tugs lightly on my pajama pants, sliding them down my smooth, slender legs then off of my body completely. I shot up with a gasp as an overwhelming heat surrounded my nether regions. When I was finally fully awake, it was morning. My pants were on and I was under my blanket. I guess it really was a dream. With a groan, I get out of bed and make my way to the bathroom. I take a quick shower, brush my teeth, then look into the mirror.

"What the hell?"

I mumble out loud. On my collar bone, right above my pulse, there's a small bruise... Almost like a... "No... Oh hell no..." I leave the bathroom then leave my room. I go downstairs and glare at the male with a green hat who had just finished washing the dishes. "Caaaaaaaarrrrrrrllllll!" I growl. He turns to me with that stupid innocent look. "Oh hey Paul. You're naked. Is this how you're going to be eating breakfast now? Not that I mind but a warning would've been nice." He says as he places a plate of food onto the kitchen counter. I blush darkly, trying to stay serious while trying to ignore the fact that I walked out without getting dressed. "Carl did you leave this hickey on my neck?" I ask demandingly. He walks over and studies the bruise so closely that I could feel his breath on my chest. He quickly stands up straight and turns around, attempting to hide what I believe to be a smirk.

"Nope! I definitely didn't leave that nor would I ever want to."

My eye twitched with irritation. Before I could say anything, I caught something in the corner of my eye and just looked at it a bit confused and horrified. "Carl, what is that thing?! Why is it in our kitchen?" I asked. I guess it was a statue of some sort. It looked like a giant babyface with dead babies hanging from its mouth. "Oh, that. Remember those baby hands? Well i found that instead of eating them, I could make art so I made this. Like it?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed. "I know I'm not going to like the answer but where did the dead babies come from?"

"From the place at the hospital where they put stillborn babies at."

My jaw dropped with horror. "Caaaarrrrlllll! Why would you do something like that?!"

"My statue needed something to eat."

"Those babies have parents who would like to bury or cremate their dead child!" I cried.

"It was either dead babies or living ones."

Carl said, narrowing his eyes. "I would rather you don't use any babies!" I shouted. "Well its too late now, I'm not taking them back. Finders keepers, losers weepers." I rolled my eyes. "God Carl, you're like a child! An evil psychotic child! At least leave this thing in the basement." I poked the statue then backed away with a shiver. "But thats where I store my orphan meat." Carl whined. He really looked like a child the way he puffed up his cheeks with a pout. "T-then put it in the attic!" I demanded. "But thats where the meat dragon sleeps and I don't want her to eat it."

"Whatever Carl, just do something with it. I'm going shopping for more NORMAL food."

I head back upstairs to my room to get dressed. I put on my red pants, my red sweater, and my pink hat with the flower on it. Carl says it makes me look like a girl but i ignore him. He doesn't know anything. As I shop, I couldn't help but feel just a little lonely. I usually shop with Carl. I guess I'm so used to hearing his stupid voice that not hearing it is unnerving and would usually mean impending doom for those around me. And yet, nothing happened. No blood, no explosion, no random meat dragon attacking the place, it was peaceful. I'm going to take full advantage!

I sigh and lean against the kitchen counter with a frown then a smile. 'I know the perfect place for it to go.' With the help of the dragon, I drag the statue all the way to its new spot and laugh to myself. I don't know why but I live to torment people and I love showing Paul my work even more. He does this thing everytime where he calls my name in a long, annoyed and horrified tone then asks me what and why I did something. I love hearing that tone or really, I love to hear him call my name. Just seeing the horror etched onto his pretty little face is kind of a turn on. I wish there was something I could do to make him more afraid of me... I could force myself on him but thats not the kind of fear I want to see... Well actually it is but then that look of betrayal will ruin it and betrayal is not the look I'm looking for... What am I looking for? Oh well. I don't really have any plans of torment today. I should feed Paulina, the meat dragon, then think of something to do. Making skin rugs out of people is tomorrow's plan...

Making pillows is the day after...

I never thought I'd get creator's block like this. I guess I could go a day without killing (can't say much about Paulina). But what do I do then? I guess I can always play the piano, I did make it out of the bones of that church choir and its been sitting all by its lonesome in the spare bedroom that Paul refuses to go in. I climb the stairs and go to the room with the piano. I sit down before it and think of something to play. What should it be... The sound of my inner sorrow maybe? But what song would that be? I decide to play Come, Sweet Death by Bach. Though it would be better played on an organ, I try my best on the piano. It has been a very long while since I've played the piano yet I have yet to hit a sour note.. I close myeyes and just let the music flow from my memory to my fingertips and play.

"Carl..."

I hear my name being said softly after I finish playing. "Oh, hey Paul, I didn't hear you come in." I say with a smile. He looks at me a bit horrified and completely shocked. "I... I didn't know you could play..." He breathed. For some reason that statement hurt a little. "There are a lot of things you don't know about me since you don't ask." I say softly. "Where did you learn to play like that?" He looks so cute, looking so mesmerized and surprised. I like that look too. "I don't really remember but hey, it doesn't matter. What did you buy?" I ask, standing up and ushering him out of the room. I should lock it. "Well I bought myself more yogurt, some hamburger meant, and some vegetables. I also bought more paper towels, toilet paper, and some cat food for that cat that sleeps on the porch. I'm thinking about adopting it and calling her Carmen after the opera." Look at him. Looking so adorable in his pink hat and his calm face. I wonder why I want to see that face contorted with pain and horror? Am I really that bad of a person to want to see such sad faces? Maybe. While Paul was talking, I pushed him against the wall and looked down into his eyes. He looked back with fear and a glint of lust. How interesting.

"W-what are you doing Carl?"

He asks. I don't answer and just bring my face a little closer to his.

"T-this isn't funny Carl, stop!"

I kept going until he looked as though he were about to cry out of fear. I stepped away and went back into the piano room. That was the look I wanted. The fear, the horror of what it looked like I was going to do, but then there was the lust. It was a very small hint of it that grew just a tiny bit. I wonder how many times he has given me that look? It didn't count if he's asleep, you make any kind of face when you believe that you're dreaming. I want more of that, fear and lust. I just need to think up better ways to do it.

I had never known Carl could play any instrument aside from a child skin drum that he made last Christmas. I never really asked him about his talents or his childhood because I feared the answer. I think I really want to get to know him... I don't know why but... I think I'm starting to like him... Yeah he's a psychotic sociopath but he can be nice and merciful at times. I mean, I nagged him to death but he found homes for three of the orphans (with the expense of roasting their cat alive) he wasn't holding in the shed, he didn't kill the mail man, and he made an actual dinner with regular beef. I really need to get some sleep, or at least take a nap... A nap sounds good. Its still early in the day, to early for bed. I head to my room and lay down. Aside from the horror filled morning with that-

The hell?

What the hell?!

I scream louder than I've ever screamed in my life, sounding like a girl. Why... Why is THAT in my room?!

"Caaaaarrrrrrlllllllll! Why the heck is the baby face statue in my room?!" He popped up into my room and feigned surprise. "Oh, wow, how did that get in here? Its over 500 pounds. I'm not Hercules." He said, turning to leave. "C-Carl, why is its mouth moving like its chewing?! Oh god I don't think a couple of those babies are dead- CARL GET THAT THING OUT OF HERE I WOULD LIKE TO TAKE A NAP AND GO TO SLEEP TONIGHT!" I scream. "Sorry, can't help you."

"Caaarrrlll!"

"Nope, sorry."

"Caaaaarrrrrrlllll!"

"Eeeehhhhh."

"CCCCCAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLL!"

"Fine! Paulina! Help daddy again."

The meat dragon then tore off the roof and roared. "Did you name her after me?!" Ugh, this was too much in one day. "Well she roars like you do and when she does, it sounds like that thing you do when I do something wrong." He motioned for her to grab the statue. "What THING?! You mean scold you?!" I growl. How insulting! "Yeah, that thing. Anyway, was that cool or what? I didn't even expect that to come to life. Enjoy your nap. Later." Carl left my room and closed my door. Paulina put the roof back on and flew away. I lay down on my bed and immediately fall asleep. My bed was so warm... So inviting...

"So cute..."

What?

"Skin so smooth."

Aahhh... Those ghost like touches were back. They caressed my body all over. A warm mouth kissed my skin and licked down to my crotch. It felt so good yet so wrong... This couldn't be a dream... Reluctantly, I force myself to wake up, only to find Carl to be the owner of the ghost hands. I start to panic. This isn't right. This isn't what I wanted. "C-Carl! What are you doing?!" I feel myself about to cry. "I'm doing what I've been doing for these past three months. You just happened to wake up." I push him away, only to have my arms pinned above my head.

"Don't fight me Paul."

"Let me go Carl! This isn't funny! Don't you think this is going to far?!"

"No Paul. I haven't gone far enough."

He looked so cute beneath me. Tears fell from his horrified eyes. I don't know why I went along with this. Why I'm not stopping. This isn't something that I usually do. This isn't what I want to do to him but he made me get to this point. He was getting hard to surprise. He was getting used to my antics. His green eyes already saw through my lies and innocent facade. There was no way I'd be able to see his horrified looks again if nothing I did surprised him. He's my friend though, right? I want to be more than friends but I also want to make him cry. Make him scream with pain and fear.

"Please let me go Carl... Please..."

I kiss him deeply just to shut him up temporarily. He whimpers softly yet he starts to kiss back. I have to pull away. "What do you want Paul?! Make up your mind! Do you hate me? Are you afraid of me?" I shout at him. "Just please leave me alone Carl..." I trail my free hand down to his entrance and lightly slide my fingers against him. He gasps and shuts his mouth tightly. "I'm sorry Paul but I'm not going to leave, and I'm not letting you go." I lather my fingers and push the into Paul. His expressions and reactions confused the hell out of me. His eyes was full of lust, fear, disbelief, and hurt. I'm forcing myself on him and he yells at me yet he kisses me back. Does he want me to do this or not? I stretch him and continue to hold his hands above his head. He whimpers and moans as I push my fingers deeper into him. I really don't understand him but there's no turning back.

"Relax Paul. Relax as much as you can. As much as I wanted to hurt you, I don't want you to be messed up down here."

"Please don't do this Carl..."

"I'll listen to you when you tell me the truth."

I remove my fingers and reach over to Paul's nightstand and get a bottle of lotion. I use its contents to lather myself up and slowly push myself into his tight heat. He writhes beneath me and let's out a long moan. I'm not sure if its out of pain or pleasure and I don't really care, at least not that much. Sliding in and out of him was the best feeling I've ever felt in my entire life. I started slowly but eventually thrust harder and faster. He moaned louder and sounded more like a slut yet he was crying. I don't understand why he's crying! I let go of his hands and hold onto his hips so I can thrust deeper into him. When I do, he throws his head back and screams out my name. I thrust there again and get the same reaction. Now I really know that he's feeling good.

"Caaaaaaaarrrrrrllllllllll~!"

"Did you make up your mind yet Paul?"

He wraps his arms around my neck and sobs into my shoulder but continues to moan until I freeze with this unexpected action. "I-I'll never forgive you for doing this Carl... All of the torture... The torment... Forcing yourself onto me... I won't forgive you! I can't forgive you because I love you... Keep going... Just finish what you started like you always do..." He mumbles into my shoulder. I wrap my arms around him and thrust harder and faster than before. Damnit Paul... "I love you too..." I whisper.

Here I am again, lying awake in bed because Carl is downstairs making a bunch of noise. I guess you learn to live with it but I have a job now and I have to wake up early. I wish he would understand that. Once the notice stops, I hear light footsteps as he climbs the stairs. He goes into the spare bedroom and I hear soft noes be played from the piano. They sound so calm and welcoming, it felt like he was hugging me with the song. By the time I realized I had dozed off, Carl had climbed in bed and just held me tightly until I fell asleep.

Damnit Carl...

It better just be another pillow.


End file.
